Risk management is not about enumeration nor prioritization. It is about acting on d(information) and avoiding risks (or unfavorable risk/return cahracteristics) wherever possible!

With risks where the stakes are high like in this situation I'd rather go for the condom when having intercourse with a woman. That seems like a good decision. If I got HIV from a woman it wouldn't help me that it was a lot less likely than getting it from men.

Your suggestion of increasing information would most likely lead to more carelessness for heterosexual intercourses and the risk ratio would change.